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Quagmire 3 x 22
Episode: Quagmire   Episode Number: 3x22   Tagline: The Truth is Out There


USFS: "Frog populations are declining all over the globe, Dr. Faraday. No one knows why. We can't possibly place them all on the Endangered Species List."
Faraday: "You'd find a way if they were cute furry mammals we were dealing with." ---

(Queequeg goes nuts in the back seat)
Scully: "Nature's calling, I think we should pull over soon."
Mulder: "Did you really have to bring that thing?"
Scully: (Pause) "You wake me up on a Saturday morning, tell me to be ready in five minutes, my mother's out of town, all of the dog sitters are booked and you know how I feel about kennels. So, unless you want to lose your security deposit on the car, I suggest you pull over." ---

Scully: "So you think . . . that there is a serial killer at large?"
Mulder: "Eh, the operative word being 'large'." ---

Faraday: "Closest he ever came to communing with nature was subscribing to National Geographic." ---

Scully: "Y'know, his fly's undone."
Mulder: "Are you insinuating something?" ---

Scully: ". . . we eat fish and fish eat us."
Mulder: "Are fish also known for eating half and saving half for later?" ---

Mulder: "Yeah, but you got 2 to 3 in as many weeks. I'd say you're a little out of your bell curve, sheriff." ---

Scully: "It's all a hoax?"
Mulder: (Finding blood) "Yeah, but what happened to the hoaxer?" ---

Mulder: "It's three in one day, sheriff. All this driving from crime scene to crime scene is giving me highway hypnosis." ---

Mulder: "Want me to come with you?"
Scully: (Revealing gun in waistband) "I'm fine." ---

Scully: "Could you please repeat the last part again? I kinda faded out."
Mulder: "Which . . . which part?"
Scully: "After you said I'm sorry?" ---

Scully: "You know, on the old mariners maps the cartographers would designate uncharted territories by writing 'here be monsters.'"
Mulder: "Uh, I got a map of New York City just like that." ---

Mulder: (Monster approaching) "Here be monsters, Scully." ---

Scully: (As boat sinks) "There goes our $500 deposit." ---

Mulder: "yeah, you know, living in the city you forget that night is so, uh, dark." ---

Scully: "It's not until you get back out to nature until you realize that everything is out to get you. And my father always taught me to respect nature, 'cause it has no respect for you." ---

(Duck swims in out of fog, both have guns drawn)
Scully: (Big sigh, puts gun away)
Mulder: "I'm still tempted to fire." ---

Mulder: Hey Scully, do you think you could ever cannabalize someone? I mean if you really had to.
Scully: Well, as much as the very idea is abhorrent to me, I suppose under certain conditions a living entity is practically conditioned to perform whatever extreme measures are necessary to ensure its survival. I suppose I'm no different. Mulder: You've lost some weight recently, haven't you? ---

Scully: "I called him Ahab and he called me Starbuck. So I named my dog Queequeg . . . It's funny, I just realized something."
Mulder: "It's a bizarre name for a dog, huh?"
Scully: "No. How much YOU'RE like Ahab. You're so . . . consumed by your personal vengeance against life, whether it be its inherent cruelties or its mysteries, and . . . everything takes on a warped significance to fit your megalomaniacal cosmology."
Mulder: "Scully, are you coming on to me?" ---

Scully: "You know Mulder, you ARE Ahab . . ."
Mulder: "You know . . . it's interesting you should say that because I've always wanted a pegleg . . ." ---

(Big splashing approaches)
Scully: "What was that?"
Mulder: "Idunno, but it ain't no duck." ---

(After encountering Mulder & Scully stranded alone on a rock in lake)
Dr. Faraday: "Hope I'm not interrupting anything." ---

Scully: (To Mulder) "Well, captain, what now?" ---

Scully: "Well, you slew the big white whale, Ahab."
Mulder: "Yeah, but I still don't have that pegleg."

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