Episode: Dreamland II Episode Number: 6x05 Tagline: The Truth is Out There
Morris: (voice-over) Once upon a time, there was a guy with the improbable name of Fox Mulder. He started out life happily enough, as these things go. He had parents who loved him, a cute kid sister. He had a roof over his head, got all his flu shots, had all his fingers and toes and aside from being stuck with the name "Fox" which probably taught him how to fight -- or not -- he pretty much led a normal life. But the worst thing by far -- the biggest kick in the slacks this kid Fox ever got-- was what happened to his sister. One day, she just disappeared. Now, Fox buckled down and worked his butt off. Graduated top of his class at Oxford then top of his class at the FBI academy. None of that hard work made up for his sister, though. It was just a way of putting her out of his mind. Finally, the way I figure it, he went out of his mind and he's been that way ever since. Fox Mulder pissed away a brilliant career, lost the respect of supervisors and friends and now lives his life shaking his fist at the sky and muttering about conspiracies to anyone who will listen. If you ask me, he's one step away from pushing a baby carriage filled with tin cans down the street. But now, all that's going to change. ---
Morris (as Mulder): No, no, no. Up, up... Whew. (golf ball goes in) I am Tiger Woods. ---
(Morris goes over to a closed door.
He tries to open it. Nothing happens. He tries again. Nothing. He pulls
really hard. The door pops open and several boxes and porno magazines
Joanne Fletcher: I've heard enough
from you for one lifetime, Morris. Go tell it to that tramp of yours,
that Scully, whatshername.
Mulder (as Morris): My name is not
Morris Fletcher. It's Fox Mulder. Special Agent Fox Mulder with the
FBI. Dana Scully is my FBI partner. I am not your husband, we are not
married, we are complete strangers and I have a whole other life that
I'm desperately trying to get back to.
(Overhead mirror shot of Morris as
Mulder laughing and handing Scully a champagne glass on the waterbed.)
Morris (as Mulder): As far as I'm
concerned this thing is a gift from heaven. Besides, no one is ever
going to believe you so you might as well just get used to me being
Morris (as Mulder): Can't we start over? You know, do that thing with the handcuffs? (Scully holds up and cocks her gun.) Morris (as Mulder): Probably not your scene. ---
Mulder (as Morris): I guess I make a lousy husband. ---
Langly: Mmm. More huevos rancheros.
Byers: (to Morris) Where did you
Scully: . . . Mulder, if we were .
. . If we were off . . . If the event were off by even one millisecond
. . .
Scully: (to Mulder) I have to talk
to you alone.
Morris (as Mulder): So this is time
Scully: (on phone) Good night.