X Files Episodes
X Files Episodes

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Agua Mala 6 x 14
Episode: Agua Mala   Episode Number: 6x14   Tagline: The Truth is Out There
Working Title: Bad Water/Jellyfish


Mulder's Answering Machine: Hi, this is Fox Mulder. You can leave me a message after the beep.
Arthur Dales: (voice on machine) Agent Mulder, this is Arthur Dales calling from Florida. I don't know if you're watching the news but we're in for a hell of a blow in the next 12 to 24. I been through hurricanes, Mulder, been through the alphabet. But I just got a distress call from my neighbor down the road to set my teeth on edge. You don't have much time to get to the airport but if you're the X-Files man you say you are you better get your butt in gear. ---

Man 1: We got no sign of anything amiss here at that residence out on the spit. Place is all boarded up tight, over.
Man 2: Roger that. Maybe the occupants have evacuated, over.
Man 1: Well, that would be the Shipleys, but a neighbor called and says they couldn't have gone too far without their only vehicle which is still in the carport out here, over.
Man 2: Well. That sounds like a real mystery, don't it?
Dales: It sure does, you dumb fathead. ---

Dales: Well, it couldn't be that all the planes out were fully loaded, huh?
Mulder: Mr. Dales, there's a reason that people don't head out into hurricanes.
Dales: (dismissively) Yeah. The hurricane's 20 miles offshore. ---

Dales: (to Mulder) Did you tell her what I told you?
Mulder: Yes, but she's . . . she's not the type that's easily persuaded.
Dales: Is that so?
Scully:What he means is I don't hear a story about a sea monster and automatically assume it's the Lord's gospel truth. ---

Dales: (to Mulder) Why did you bring her here?
Mulder: Well, she knows your reputation your early work on the X-Files and she has a knack for getting to the bottom of things.
(Scully sees several empty liquor bottle in the garbage can.)
Scully: Apparently, so does Mr. Dales.
Dales: It's a good thing I have a reputation. Otherwise, how could it be impugned? ---

Dales: I got on the horn to the local constabulary but they're about as . . . helpful as a fart in a windstorm. ---

Scully: What is it that brought you out here in the first place, Mr. Dales?
Dales: I came down for the weather. Don't sneer at the mysteries of the deep, young lady. The bottom of the ocean is as deep and dark as the imagination. ---

Scully: How the hell did the cat get in the washing machine?
Mulder: Maybe he was taking a dip . . . After he finished boarding up the windows. ---

Mulder: You can put the gun down. We're FBI.
Deputy Greer: Don't all the nuts roll downhill to Florida? ---

Scully: Well, what else would we be doing out here on a night like this?
Deputy Greer: You could be looters. For all I know, you could be part of the Manson family. ---

Deputy Greer: Oh, no. You're going to kill me.
Mulder: No, I'm not, but I'd like to. ---

Deputy Greer: I gotta at least make out a report. Mulder: No, no, no. Not before you help me finish what you interrupted. Deputy Greer: Yes, sir. May I have my gun, please? (Mulder pauses, then smiles and hands the gun back.) Deputy Greer: Thank you. ---

Mulder: (about Dales) Don't dismiss him so easily. He discovered the X-Files 40 years ago. He's seen things that I've only read about. ---

Scully: You know what? Maybe you are a member of the Manson family. ---

Scully: Sir, it's important that we evacuate the area. We're FBI agents and we need to get to where we're going. Road Block Deputy: Don't all the nuts roll downhill to Florida. ---

Mulder: The good thing about zero visibility, Scully? Can't get any worse. ---

Mulder: You know, Scully, someday we're gonna look back on this and we're gonna laugh. We'll just think of it as, uh . . . you know man pitted against the forces of nature. Think of it as a test of our mettle.
Scully: I don't need my mettle tested. ---

(Mulder goes into the bathroom and looks in the slimy toilet. He pulls out a man's watch.)
Mulder: I've heard of passing the time . . . Ouch. ---

Scully: I have a deputy who's been attacked by something as yet unidentified.
Arthur Dales: (listening over the radio - laughs) Unidentified? My ass! ---

George: What the hell are you talking about? Hmm? It don't matter. I'm armed against it. The Junta, Cuba and Castro. I'm not going to cede my home to no revolutionaries without a fight. You got anything else you want to throw at me-- you bring it on.
Mulder: All the nuts roll down to Florida. ---

Angela: Now, who are you?
Dougie: Nobody.
Angela: Nobody? Oh, well, it is so nice to be surrounded by so many great men. ---

George: Federal agents-- jack-booted fascists bent on trampling the rights of the common man. Don't need their damn help defending my home. Violence in the pursuit of freedom is no vice. Because all that's needed for tyranny to prevail is for good men to do nothing.---

Walter: Where did it go?
Mulder: I don't know. It must still be in the building. It's probably in the outflow system.
Walter: Well, maybe it'll just flow back out.
George: Or maybe it'll come up through the can and grab you by the nugs.
Mulder: Someone's already got him by the nugs. ---

Angela: "Remain calm?" I got to pee so bad my back teeth are swimming. ---

Angela: (pushing her way to the bathroom) Supertanker coming through.
Walter: Here, Angela, you can't go in there.
Angela: My bladder is pressing against your unborn child, Walter. He's going to have a head like a tortilla. ---

Dales: If Agent Scully had not been there with you I shudder to think what would have happened to you. I'd say you owe her your life. It takes a big man to admit this, but . . . if I had had someone as savvy as her by my side all those years ago in the X-Files I might not have retired. I suggest that we have a toast to your good fortune. And I insist that we have it. So . . . what'll it be? ---

Dales: Anyone for water?
Mulder AND Scully: No!

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