QUOTES

Nancy Kline: Honey, would you just calm down. Rules are rules.
Dave Kline: They're repainting our mailbox because it's "Desert Sienna" instead of "Desert Sage." I mean, this guy is a freakin' weirdo. ---

Mulder: I'm Rob . . . (puts his hands affectionately on Scully's shoulders) . . . and this is my lovely wife, Laura.
Pat Verlander: Rob and Laura Petrie.
Scully: We pronounce it "Pee-trie," actually.
Pat Verlander: Oh.
Mulder: Like the dish. ---

Mulder: Oh, yeah. Nothing weird going on around here. (following Scully) Hey . . . ooh, wait a minute. You didn't let me carry you over the threshold. ---

(Scully takes off her coat and faces Mulder.)
Scully: You ready?
Mulder: Let's get it on, honey.
Scully: (smiles) All right, then. (She hands him a pair of latex gloves and goes to the box that Big Mike dropped) ---

(Mulder comes very close into the video frame.)
Mulder: (seductively) You want to make that honeymoon video now? ---

(Mulder sits on the kitchen counter and pulls his gloves off.)
Scully: Rob and Laura Petrie?
Mulder: "Pee-trie."
Scully: Mulder, if we ever go undercover again I get to choose the names, okay? ---

Mulder: I'm taking it seriously. I just don't understand why we're on it. It's our first catch back on the X-Files. This isn't an X-File.
Scully: Sure it is. It's unexplained. What do you want, aliens? Tractor beams?
Mulder: Wow. Admit it, you just want to play house. ---

(Doorbell rings. Scully starts for the door.)
Mulder: (demanding) Woman, get back in here and make me a sandwich!
(Scully stops, smiles slightly and snaps off her gloves and throws them at his head and continues on to the door.)
Mulder: Did I not make myself clear? ---

Scully: Mulder . . .
Mulder: The name . . . is Rob. ---

Pat Verlander: I, uh . . . didn't really learn much about them. He just said he works at home, which tells me she's got money.
Cami Shroeder: Well . . . seemed nice. Cute couple. ---

Win Shroeder: So, good morning. So how was your first night? Peaceful?
Mulder: (looking fondly at Scully) Oh, it was wonderful. We just spooned up and fell asleep like little baby cats. Isn't that right, Honeybunch?
Scully: That's right, Poopyhead. ---

Win Shroeder: So . . . Where'd you two meet? (Scully is about to say something, but Mulder speaks first.)
Mulder: Actually, it was at a UFO conference.
Win Shroeder: Flying saucers? Interesting. Wouldn't have thought you folks would have been into that.
Mulder: (putting his arm around Scully) Well, it's not me so much as Laura. She's quite the New-Ager. I mean, she's into those magnetic bracelets and crystals and mood rings, what have you. (You see Scully, still smiling, subtly kick Mulder under the table.) I mean, God bless her she's a sucker for all that stuff.
Cami Shroeder: Well, I wouldn't have guessed that, would you?
Win Shroeder: Mm-mm.
Scully: No kidding. ---

Scully: (from the bathroom) Mulder, speaking of cleaning up, whoever taught you how to squeeze a tube of toothpaste?---

Scully: (from the bathroom) Third warning. (sound of toilet seat falling) Toilet seat. ---

Mulder: Compulsive neatness, or a lack thereof. Have you noticed how everybody around here is obsessed with the neighborhood rules and the CC&Rs? You know what? You fit in really well here.
Scully: And you don't. ---

Mulder: (He pats the bed beside him seductively and waggles his eyebrows at her. She raises her eyebrows at him.) Mulder: Come on, Laura, you know . . . we're married now.
Scully: Scully, Mulder. Good night.
Mulder: The thrill is gone. ---